I can easily get caught up in feelings of guilt over my parenting. I feel guilty over what I did and should not have done. I feel guilty over what I did not do and should have done. I feel guilty over the quality and quantity of the good I did do. Was it enough? IF ONLY I had . . .
Then I found a song that helped me. It’s from the Old Testament in Isaiah 5, verses 1-5. It’s called the Song of the Vineyard. It tells the story about God and his people, Israel. He did everything perfect in planting a vineyard: fertile land; cleared it of stones; planted the best vines; built a watchtower, and a wine press. Everything was done to produce the perfect crop and enjoy the results.
“Then He looked for a crop of good grapes but it yielded only bad fruit.” What? How was that possible?
God even raised the “why?” question we often struggle with, then He invited human judgement on His gardening skill:
“What more could have been done for my vineyard than I have done for it? When I looked for good grapes, WHY did it yield only bad?”
I think this parallels a common parenting dilemma. It’s possible to do all the right things in raising our children, yet have them still choose destructive, unfruitful ways. Yes. We can do it all perfectly, but not get the results we expected.
Do we think we can do better than God?
Notice that the “why” question was never answered. God moved past the “why?” to “what?” What will He do now?
I’m NOT saying my parenting was perfect. It was flawed at best. But perhaps it’s time to:
1. Move past guilt
2. Find comfort in a song and
3. Take steps to move forward!
*Today’s blog was written by Tom Yohe.