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be still3 - CopyHas your son or daughter has been diagnosed with a mental health issue? Major depression, obsessive compulsive, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia (among other disorders) are robbing millions of their quality of life. This is part one of a three part series highlighting information about the major mental illnesses, also called brain disorders.

My information is from The National Alliance on Mental Illness (nami.org) the major source of information, education, advocacy, and support for individuals and their families affected by this challenge.

 

Mental illnesses are not the result of personal weakness, lack of character, or poor upbringing. They are medical conditions that men, women, and sometimes even children, have no control over, like diabetes or cancer. These disorders diminish their ability to function and cope with the usual demands of life. The result is a huge ripple effect on family members and society in general. Compassion, understanding and support is needed.

In this addresses major depression. If you love someone who suffers from this, be encouraged. As the non-profit To Write Love on her Arms (twloha.com) says, “There is help and Hope is real”.

One of the best things you as a parent can do is to educate yourself as much as you can. It helped me. Continue Reading »

It’s Mother’s Day. A wonderful day for some. A painful day for others. I wrote this special prayer for every brokenheartedacceptance mom. For every mom whose son or daughter is away from them, “out there”,  lost to some kind of addiction (drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, gambling, etc.); who can’t stop self-injuring, can’t overcome their eating disorder, refuses treatment for a mental health issue, in denial of their need for help; who has rejected their faith and values, chosen another life-style. There’s nothing quite so painful, is there?

Hurting mom, this prayer is for you:

Heavenly Father, on this day of celebrating mothers, please surround every hurting mom who reads these words with a comforting, warm embrace. Hold them close to Your nurturing heart.

Console them with Your divine “mother-love”. Reassure them You are near. Ease their pain. Lessen the ache in their soul.

Creator of motherhood – this desire to procreate, care for, nurture, and love unconditionally – is from You. You’re the One who gave this capacity to sacrifice  for another human being, no matter how we’re treated in return. Continue Reading »

Is Mother’s Day going to be difficult for you this year? If so, then this is for you.

It’s not a day many moms look forward to. It only brings pain. Sadness. Heartache. When your relationship is strained or mother's daynon-existent you’d rather skip it. You know you probably won’t hear from them, much less get a card.

You won’t see their smiling face greet you with affection, hand-made cards or thoughtful gifts. They’re too self-focused and oblivious for such loving gestures. They may not even know it’s Mother’s Day. They’re clueless.

Where does that leave you? Set up for a lot of hurt and pain, anger and resentment. Continue Reading »

When I heard about the terrible earthquake that hit Nepal and the growing death toll, I moaned. It hurt my heart. It’s difficultearthquake in Nepal to imagine that degree of suffering, loss, and destruction. Many parents – maybe you – find themselves living in what feels like an earthquake, but their child caused it. Emotionally, it brings about total upheaval of your foundations. It’s devastating. Earth-shaking. You’re not sure you have the strength or survival skills to live through it. You have no idea where to turn for help. You cry out to God and wonder when or where rescue will come?

It may feel too late. The destruction has already hit.

When I felt this way because of my daughter’s addictions, self-injuring, mental illness, suicide attempts and sexual trauma, there were four words I needed to hear. I believe they were from God. They were: Continue Reading »

Are you a parent or grandparent who lives with a broken heart due to the behaviors and choices of one or several of your children or grandchildren? They may be under powerful prayereighteen and still in your home or thirty-five and married with children. The feelings of loss, embarrassment and shame often keep us from reaching out to others for prayer and support.

You need to know that June 2nd is the Annual Day of Prayer for Prodigals, sponsored by Cru (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ). This was designed for you!

When my husband and I found ourselves grieving the choices of our daughter, we suffered deeply when she moved out to pursue a life of substance abuse. We isolated ourselves. Heavily involved in our church and full-time ministry our whole adult lives, we didn’t want anyone to know what was going on. There would be too many questions, too much judgement, and too few people who could understand. Have you ever felt this way?

What was our greatest need? Prayer Continue Reading »

come1You’ve been a good, loving, conscientious parent. You did the best you could. You thought you did it all right, you even took your child to church so they would believe in God and know right from wrong. You provided everything you thought was necessary for them to have a great life. But, somehow, you find yourself facing terribly painful situations with them that you never saw coming and you beat yourself up about it. You’re so hard on yourself, convinced it’s all your fault.

Your son or daughter has developed an addiction. They smoke pot every day. They need alcohol to function. They’ve been diagnosed with a mental illness (brain disorder) and either refuse treatment or can’t find the right medications. They’ve attempted suicide and been hopeless many times. Your daughter’s pregnant, or your son Continue Reading »

Are you the parent or grandparent in pain from a broken heart? Is your pain from the choices, behaviors or struggles of your photo cred. Jordan McQueenchild or grandchild? Mental illness, addiction, self-injury, an  eating disorder, suicidal tendencies, same-sex attraction, incarceration, or an unplanned pregnancy?

They feel like elephants sitting on our chests. They hang like menacing storm clouds over our heads, creating a constant state of anxiety and panic we can’t shake. Nausea is our regular unwanted companion. Maybe you’re a relative or friend of someone this describes. If so, I wrote this for you.

In my opinion, there are 5 things parents in pain (and yes, I’m a member of that club) want their loved ones and friends to know:

1. We need a lot of patience and understanding. Lots of it. We’re not ourselves. We can’t think straight. We may be more forgetful than usual. We may look all right on the outside, but inside we feel like we’re dying. Continue Reading »

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